Togetherness in Marriage

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Marriage isn’t easy, is it? Sometimes there are some hard decisions that we have to make together right? But we have to and get to, face life together.

When my wife and I got married we agreed that I would make all the major decisions and she would make all the minor decisions so far there have been no major decisions (just kidding).

So, I’d like to take some time and share some thoughts about togetherness.

The crowning point of creation was mankind. But there was something pretty amazing and beautiful in that process. In God’s goodness and His love for Adam, he blessed him with a wife.

The Bible tells us in – Proverbs 18:22 “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.”

So…we are going to start in Genesis 2 if you’d like turn there.

  1. The Beauty of the Garden

Genesis 2:8–10 “And the LORD God planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed. 9 And out of the ground made the LORD God to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight, and good for food; the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of knowledge of good and evil. 10 And a river went out of Eden to water the garden; and from thence it was parted, and became into four heads.”

Here we have a beautiful outdoor scene. The Pristine beauty of the creation there in the Garden of Eden was certainly breathtaking. There were big beautiful trees, lush grassy fields, and a crystal clear river that ran right through the middle of it and split off into four different rivers.

I can only imagine the fresh natural smell of that untouched garden….

I’m an outdoorsman and can never get enough of nature. So, having been to places like Yosemite, and the Grand Canyon, and the Alps, I can only imagine how beautiful the Garden of Eden was, as Adam walked with God and explored that amazing landscape.

Yet, there was something missing, wasn’t there?

  1. The Bliss of Love

(Genesis 2:18–25) …..And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. 19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. 20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. 21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; 22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. 23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. 24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. 25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

Here, we find the perfect innocence and purity of marriage, as the Lord intended. Adam and Eve were perfectly happy together you could say they were made for each other because they were.

We don’t know how long they spent together in this stunningly gorgeous natural garden. But we do know that they were happy there.

The time they had together was as romantic and loving and passionate as you can imagine.

They had each other and they had God and marriage was bliss. Their nakedness together was innocent and pure and natural like everything else that God had made.

Everything was perfect, but then they discovered…

  1. The Burden of Sin

Genesis 3:1–7 Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden? 2 And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden: 3 But of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die. 4 And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die: 5 For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil. 6 And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat. 7 And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons.

Their choice to let sin enter into their relationship was a bad choice. It was Satan that introduced rebellion into the creation and sowed the seeds of sin into their hearts.

That serpent convinced Eve that God was somehow holding out on them and that there was something great that God didn’t want them to know about.

That resulted in Eve giving into temptation and Adam willingly following, and so there sin had entered into the world. That sin quickly came between them and God which was a terrible thing for their marriage.

But that sin also came between the two of them, and marriage has never been the same since. We do know this, Adam and Eve went down that troubled road of sin together.

They still had each other. but then they experienced…

4. The Bitterness of Loss

Genesis 4:8–10 And Cain talked with Abel his brother: and it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him. 9 And the LORD said unto Cain, Where is Abel thy brother? And he said, I know not: Am I my brother’s keeper? 10 And he said, What hast thou done? the voice of thy brother’s blood crieth unto me from the ground.

We don’t know exactly when Cain and Abel were born, but Genesis 5 tells us that Adam was 130 when their son Seth was born, so it was some time before that.

You can imagine how much Adam and Eve loved their two boys. They had watched them grow up together and play together and become men together.

We don’t get much background, but we do know that there was this terrible conflict. Without getting into the weeds theologically let’s just understand that it was because of Cain’s pride.

As a result of this conflict and the sin that was now a part of their nature. Cain ended up killing his brother Abel. Adam and Eve lost both sons that day. God cursed and banished Cain, so not only was Abel dead but Cain was gone!

I think it is here that Adam and Eve first got a taste of what God must have felt like that day that they betrayed the Lord.

We know that Cain and Abel were not perfect sons but no doubt they loved those boys dearly. Now one was dead and the other one was gone, and the bitterness of that loss must have been very painful for them emotionally.

The Bible doesn’t develop that story and I don’t want to add to the Bible, but we can be sure Adam and Eve went through a really hard time after that.

I can tell you this, Adam and Eve went through that together and were there for each other. All the doubts and hurts and pain became a part of their marriage and they made it together.

They went on to have many other children and although there were times of hardship and loss life pressed on.

Adam lived to be 930 years old according to the Bible.

But listen, through it all Adam and Eve had each other.

Final Thoughts

I want to encourage you to cherish the marriage that God has blessed you with, as you go through life TOGETHER.

Seek to have that kind of bond that Adam and Eve had when there was innocence and the purity of undefiled love TOGETHER, when there was a spiritual hardship, and they had to face the consequences TOGETHER, and when there was the pain of loss, and they had family fighting, and trials and struggles…TOGETHER.

Don’t let the difficulties of sin, and the pressures of life, get between you.

Seek forgiveness and restoration and understand that your spouse married you a far from a perfect person.…and you married them.

That love that brought you together is still a God-given love.

God created it, he ordained marriage, and he still blesses marriage.

Proverbs 18:22 “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.”


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